I blame the carrot for being extra hard. I blame Sonia the cleaning lady for hiding the safe guard of the slicer in some obscure place so I was forced to push the carrot with my bare hands. I blame the blade for being so darned sharp. But most of all, I blame myself for being so stupid and careless. What was I thinking! Was it absolutely necessary to get exactly two cups of shredded carrots? Would I have been punished for eternity and beyond for throwing the last bit of carrot out because it was getting too dangerous to shred it? Of course not! Then why did I insist on risking digital amputation for a mere salad?
I had never seen so much blood coming out of myself before. I mean I’m sure everyone has cut their fingers at some point in their cooking attempts, but I’m talking about blood gushing out and dripping down my arms while I tried to tie tourniquets around the thumbs with both arms raised above my head. I now fully understand the important functions that the thumbs carry out, besides pushing buttons on my mobile phone. The right thumb was cut near the tip where it’s mostly thick skin so even though it looked scary – a dangling flap of flesh, it had almost stopped bleeding when I checked this morning. The left thumb is doing far worse. It’s a deep 1cm cut about 3 mm deep in the fleshy part of the thumb pad. Blood was still oozing out but it’s much better compared to last night. Then there’s the pain. A throbbing dull pain that refused to go away for hours and persistently came back every time I changed the blood soaked bandages. Let this pain serve as a reminder the next time I even think of attempting something remotely reckless in the kitchen. Gosh this has got to be the stupidest I’ve ever felt about myself.